And Oedipus Answered the Sphinx:

I was there when this world was born. I was there
—at the horizon—where they separated sky from
            sea, the line that is no line,
            except that you expect it to be.

I was there when the bonds were forged,
and have been made anew each morning,
            pulled from fire, fresh, baked
            in pain—only steam escapes.

And I am here at the end of things—call me
vulture, all eyes and food-full mouth, call me
            seraphim, selfish beast
            born hoarding wings. I

need only two for flying; the others are just covering
my eyes and keeping my feet clean. I hover above
            the people in the street, who
            walk awkwardly, limp limbs

dragging. They have nothing on their backs but
bundles brimming with other people’s dreams.
            I add to each my sympathies.
            Sorry is a toy with strings.

Lobster Boy Learns to Love God

Tonight I will lift both feet
over that pale lip and kick

back in a bubbling bath
and try to relax, close my eyes

to what happens around me,
my friends, my family clamoring.

For the first time in a long time,
I will let your heat sink in

to my skin, like butter
cream. I’ll think

of all the ways I’ve been
warm and wet for others.

Like the catch I am I’ll slip in
to your display tank thankful

for the gentle way you bind my hands
to help me pray, to keep me

safe, from reaching out and
holding others over-lovingly,

and when the time comes for you to lift me up
and show me to my god, let him know:

that although he made me
with claws I will not use them,

except as vehicles to feed him.
Run me through your palms, crack

my brittle husk in half and suck
my soul out through the shell.

Chuck me, empty,
into hell.

Ren, I Will Ride This Tractor Til We Crash

I hate that little smile babies make at you
     like they know something you don’t      but I also hate
the smiles that adults make     when they think they know something
     they don’t         so the key thing isn’t really babies
it’s smiles                          no           wait          I fucked that up
the key thing is hate           yes         I hate the way I feel
     terrorized by every aspect of my life
            and so I suppose it doesn’t really matter
where the terror comes from since it’s always there        anyway
it’s like     a diner that always has the same special
       it doesn’t exactly make a meal feel “special” you know?
I guess what I’m saying is my depression feels ordinary    
     and I want it to    like  surprise me every now and then
                      I just miss the mystery

All my life I wanted to be a regular    one of the guys
who comes in every morning and orders the same thing
and the waiter says Mornin’ Jim

                         in this particular dream my name is Jim
                         because Jim is a good name for a regular
             and I plan on being extremely regular

and anyway he says Mornin’ Jim and pours me coffee
before I even sit down          maybe it’s there before I even walk in
or like I’m so fucking regular he sets his clock by me        like     I walk in
and the clock on his wall says 6:05 and he immediately gets up and smashes it with a broom
screaming USELESS PIECE OF TRASH and I have to run over and wrestle the broom from his
hands and he doesn’t want to give it up but then he feels my touch on his shoulder and knows it’s
me and his muscles relax and I notice he’s surprisingly taught under there but that’s as far as the
thought goes and I say
       Why don’t we get you cleaned up
because by this point he’s pretty sweaty and a little bloody from the glass and he says
        Thanks Jim I can always count on you

And I do want to be someone who can be counted on
     I want to be somebody’s meaty TI-84 graphing calculator
which is strangely     the only kind of graphing calculator I have ever seen
                     but that’s a continuity error
                     in someone else’s story
not mine           this one’s mine
     and in this one I want you to touch me     tenderly        and hold me
upside down so I spell out BOOBS      
     I want you to do terrible things to me        things that would get you expelled
from the private school we both attend       where they won’t let us dance
without a chaperon following along and slapping our hands with a long wooden baton
like a ballet master at the Bolshoi Academy           No one in this entire town will let us dance

And I ask you                               Where is Kevin Bacon when you need him
       Where is anyone when you need him                  Immanuel Kant for instance
walked at the same time every single day                  precisely 3:30 PM
        so I guess you’d know where to find him         at least at that time of day
    sometimes   at night   he stands outside my window with a hymnal held over his head
and sings to me                 A Mighty Fortress Is Our God                 and then leaves
and the next morning at the university he doesn’t say anything         like it never happened
     but I think he’s into me                I’m pretty sure
or he’s just really into John Hughes         which is also a possibility

Immanuel Kant and John Hughes are both dead                 Kevin Bacon is still alive
     and if he’s no longer alive by the time I’ve finished writing this      then I’m sorry
words have power     I guess                     but not the same power as DANCE
     which the late Kevin Bacon taught me          dancing through the warehouse
of my long-abandoned heart      and that’s the kind of lesson you never forget

      except you do forget to try       sometimes        you stand on the far end of the gymnasium
             hands in pockets       feet sunk firmly in sand          because this school function is
luau-themed           which you thought might be neat but is actually kind of racist
and the whole time                          the ocean is rising                  
all around you the island                         is sinking into the sea is
           waving                      goodbye              and I am standing on the far side
and we lock eyes           and we both smile              halfway between
babies and adults       and we are both terrified               of every possible outcome